Jackson Hole Underground

T‘birds T-boning before a crowd of teetotalers?

That’s what the authorities and Teton County Fair Board are promising this summer, in an apparent attempt to kill the Demo Derby as we know it.

Fed up with fans streaking between heats, officials announced last week that they are putting the Malachi Crunch on beer sales at the derby. The final event of the county fair, traditionally one of the biggest parties of the year, will be as dry as Ditch Creek come August.

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Football fans in Jackson have been talking about a couple of players besides Peyton Manning and Reggie Bush, as the NFL playoffs build toward a crescendo with the conference championships Sunday.

Turns out a pair of gridders recognizable to anyone who watches SportsCenter recently vacationed in the Hole. One is a former No. 1 draft pick whose name is now synonymous with “bust,” and the other is a defensive lineman regarded as one of the better pass rushers in the game.

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Prolonged drought, hard-packed slopes, bone-brittling cold … Hmm, sounds like time for the National Ski Areas Association’s annual Safety Awareness Week.

In a cruel twist of irony, this designated week often seems to coincide with the highest-and-driest spell of the winter and has played host to a bizarrely disproportionate share of serious injuries in recent years. Most notably, in 2004 three skiers died after colliding with trees at Jackson Hole within the span of eight days.

Safety Awareness Week will run from Jan. 13-19, after which time it should be safe to go helmetless, ski the trees or boogie in ski boots across a beer-slickened dance floor again.

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Texas troubador Robert Earl Keen returned to the Mangy Moose Saloon in Teton Village tonight.

But unlike last year, when his energetic performance triggered a blizzard of fake snow inside the bar (as pictured above), this time Keen gave a mellow, fairly routine show, according to two fans who attended. Hat pulled down low over his eyes, Keen played for about 90 minutes and called it quits after a bizarre encore in which he and his bandmates traded instruments. Fans left scratching their heads.

Last year, Jackson musician and redneck comedian Kip Attaway joined Keen for a slurring singalong of “Merry Christmas from the Family.” And Attaway introduced Keen to talented guitarist Jalan Crossland, who splits his time between Jackson, Ten Sleep, Wyo., and the road. Keen invited Crossland to tour with him, and the two headed down south last spring.

The death of skier Justin Kautz, 25, in an avalanche south of Jackson Hole Mountain Resort on Jan. 5 was hardly a surprise, given that for years lift riders have been regarding the backcountry terrain around the resort as part of the ski area. And with dangerous instabilities lingering in this year’s snowpack, it’s likely Kautz’s death won’t be the last.

Forecaster Bob Comey of the Bridger-Teton National Forest Avalanche Center sees similarities between this winter and 2000-01, a winter dubbed the “season of sorrow” when avalanches killed five skiers and snowboarders in the Jackson Hole area, among other recreation-related deaths. “We’re seeing a lot of close calls, lots of people involved in avalanches,” Comey says.

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